do you listen to adele?

you should. i just love her.

How much is that doggy in the window?

By happenstance I am home today, so we have our neighbor's doggy for a few hours. They are at work and he escaped.... Faye is thrilled! He is a good little thing to, besides the escaping, so he's even been allowed in the house since it is CRAZY windy outside and I feel bad for him!
I wish I knew his name, but I don't so I've just been calling him ''honey.''

Mobile blogger...

I now have in my hands a smart phone. Yay!!

How about a sidewise photo of my two loves bc I don't know how to turn it :-)

2011

i finally got a phone upgrade. after 3 years. ive been using an old broken phone of brad's for almost a year  it was time. this means my phone now sends (and RECEIVES!) texts, calls, i can retrieve my voicemail AND have the pleasure of email/apps/books/scriptures & the like.

so far in 4 days i've only used it to make 2 phone calls, send a few texts and to read pride&prejudice snuggled in bed with the light off(it came free on my book app-how did it know??). apparently i don't use my phone very much, which is why i probably never got an upgrade before now. BUT it's exciting! thank you samsung s 4g. i love you already.

today

dear faye, thank you for taking a long long nap today. uninterrupted. you didn't even cry or fuss. you just went right to sleep. so instead of doing dishes i just snuggled up on a couch and watched a british murder mystery.
only after treating my brain to dessert i got up & did the dishes. and cooked dinner. and started a load of laundry. and cleaned up. and made a grocery list. and sang christmas songs via pandora the whole time.
i liked today. makes up for yesterday. :)

im bitter today.

maybe i'll make up for it tomorrow.
im sorry my parents didn't pay for my education, room&board, car, credit cards, bills, didn't buy me all my cell phones and let us live with them rent free and grocery bill free.
my parents have helped me a ton, but im glad to say did not give me everything. brad parents did not help him at all with anything. that is why we are debt free and know how to live within our means. this also means we live in a dumpy freezing apartment, have few friends bc i work still so i am not fun enough to be part of any moms club and we do not own a house.
today is one of the days i pray we move to costa rica. the end. 

employment

well, i am happy to annouce i have both found my camera cord (as im sure you can tell from all the recent blogging) and brad found a job! he starts on monday. i have mixed feelings about this, which seem RIDICULOUS bc he's been out of work(or income anyway) for over 6 months.

reasons why it is great:
- brad is super happy to be working again. he is not really a lazy person. yes, he can spend a lot of time in front of the tv, but if there is work to be done, he will do that first. i know being busier will make him happier.
- he is a man & father, afterall, and wants to be the protector/provider/presider and this will give him back 3 out of 3.
- potential for having enough money for gas trips to south county or temecula or vegas again. hooray!
- faye will go back to our babysitter who basically loves her to pieces and she will have 2 or more friends to play with EVERYDAY. rina always has her 2 kids and usually a few more of other people's at her house at all times. she is an all-star. faye will be soooo happy!
- we will not spend almost every waking hour together and this will probably reduce contention.
- i can do errands much faster when i'm not with someone who insists on walking up and down every aisle and buying things not on the list.

reasons why it is not great:
- i have to go back to taking care of faye all day, well after work. let me explain: i love her, she is my baby, but when it comes to whom she choses to feed her, change her, play with her and snuggle with- it is ALWAYS daddy. i love this. i love they love each other. but now that she's had him all to herself for her whole remembrance, how am i gonna stack up?? i will not feed her cookies for breakfast, nor will i let her skip naps, nor give her my keys to play with. i am going to be a big meany for a while til she figures out the system has changed. this i am not looking forward to.
- who is going to change the gross poopie diapers?? (i am really fast at "not it!")
- salary + commission is the perfect option. money comes home at all times, but brad still has the motivation to make what he wants. this salary is like the lowest of any job ever so we will still be cutting major coupons and trimming all fat- BUT it is enough to make ends meet, so that's really all that matters.
- we will miss spending so much time together.

i know i must sound incredibly selfish, but it's just that change is hard. and this is a big change. i am a much more efficient mother when i have another pair of hands, and i know faye is going to need sometime to adjust to a new schedule. it was not easy when she was tiny & i was working and taking care of her. now that she is huge and mobile it just might be more interesting! i can't just strap her in the car seat anymore and let her sit there for 10 min while i get the rest of everything ready. :)

i am incredibly greatful that brad found some work. we don't think this is his next career, but it is something new to learn & be excited about. prayers do get answered, not always how you expect it, but answered nonetheless!!

new page. new adventure. wish us luck!

oh ya im 26

my birthday happened in the middle of the month-of-sickness in our house as well as right before our move. i pretty much completely forgot that it was happening, but brad managed to wow me with gifts i didn't know i wanted, as well as a slice of key lime pie. delish! happy birthday to me!

is 26 old? i felt like 25 was a milestone to "real"adulthood, and 26 feels just the same as 25. having faye made me old. like i am officially a mom and a wife and birthdays are just another boring nonimportant things that happen each year, like going to the dentist... sigh. maybe if i fit into my pre-preg pants i'd feel better or happier about the whole thing! :)

Young Women

for 2 years I had the privilege of being a leader to a group of 12-18 year old young women at church. when we moved, we went to a new ward (congregation) so i had to leave them. sad sad day. i watched them for 2 years grow up into beautiful strong & delightful women! miss them. they were funny, clever, happy, and great examples to me!! shout out to my ladies!

i think its time for a family pet

i might go buy a fish today...

lately:

we moved!! moving is a wonderful nightmare. you throw away and consolidate and clean and get to completely rearrange and start again... you also have to let go, clean, rearrange and start all over again. hmmmm.... let's find a way to make that easier? :)

we have all been sick for WEEKS. ugh. this cold season has really killed me this year. i had it for 2 weeks, then faye got it, and she so kindly gave it back to me! ah the family: virus paradise!

i have been forbidden from blogging about anything about brad's job situation, but COME ON. this guy gets like a million interviews in the last 6 months and no one has given him a chance, but at least we are happy! (we really are! promise!) we keep saying "we will NEVER be a family like this again. we get to spend a TON of time together, brad and faye are bffs all day while im gone and someday we will look back on this and be like 'wasn't that nice to be so close and together all the time???'" ahh the elusive someday. :)

currently i am enjoying making baby food again. for a few weeks faye was eating jars cause it was just easier.. but now that i know where my magic bullet is and i've actually gone grocery shopping, we are back in the saddle! it's easy and i like making combos of veggies faye will eat. i feel its the only super cool mom granola-hippie thing i do. :)

how are you lately?

auntie huli

hui came over monday night and made us dinner and let me bore her with stories of being sick for a week. i love faye's auntie huli! 

(she even read my little pookie a story about pookie!) :)

This is Halloween!

we carved pumpkins with our neighbors today. so fun!! i didn't take any pictures of the little girls carving... bummer, i was having too much fun and my hands were covered in pumpkin guts!!
brad did a ghostie, but i just wanted a happy pumpkin this year. a big goofy grin. how did i do? :)

happy thought

"I love to laugh Ha Ha HaHa

Loud and long and clear
I love to laugh Ho Ho Ho Ho
It’s getting worse every year
The more I laugh Ha Ha Ha Ha
The more I fill with glee
And the more with glee He He He He
The more I’m a merrier me!"


yesterday we laughed A LOT. about funny things brad says, faces our baby makes, tv shows, and just talking and joking amongst ourselves. you should have a good belly laugh every day. it's good for the soul. 

sometimes life is very stressful, disappointing and quite frankly, the pits. especially lately. the fact that we laugh a lot makes it that much easier. i love that brad is so happy, and positive, and can make us laugh. after having a big belly laugh yesterday, it made me remember again why i love our life. i love our family, our life, and that through anything, we can laugh and find JOY! :)

i choose to laugh instead of cry. crying just makes me look bad. *wink* did you laugh today?

Wow I made it sound so much more exciting than it is...

welp it's out of the bag! to HB it is!!


we are moving. it may not seem like the most exciting thing in the world to you. in fact, you may look at a map & think that the barttels family moving back to huntington beach is the least exciting thing you've heard today- it's like a 3 mile difference or less... but it is the biggest thing to happen for a long time in our little world!  

moving to HB means moving back to the stake where we know everyone. where brad lived for 9 years. where our friends are. where the beaches are long & crowded & main street hops every tuesday night. moving to HB means we can use our beach cruisers more. moving to HB feels like we are moving home.  

i loved costa mesa for 2 years & i am going to miss the super cheap, tiny, uncrowded, quiet nail salon next door where i periodically go to pamper my feet... but i am so ready to go home.

oh yeah

big shout out to my boss today. he took us to starbucks & french's bakery just bc he felt like being nice.

i never blogged about my 3 year anniversary, so here's what i have to say about it:

3 years ago in August i came to CA for a quick vacation & to scope out moving down here.

i went to a staffing agency for a prelim interview thing at 11 AM thursday. then WOOOSH i had a REAL interview at 1 PM.
i had a second interview for breakfast at 8AM friday. i told him i had to drive back to vegas, so no, i couldn't come to the office for another interview that afternoon. so we did it in the car driving back.
then i talked to him again saturday. the staffing agency negotiated my contract & called me saturday night with the news- I HAD THE JOB!!!!
i put all my stuff in boxes and into my car, went to church one last time & drove to CA to my friend meredith's parents' house sunday night & started work at 9 AM monday august 11th.

i still can't believe it happend.

that was A LIFETIME ago.

every year as this anniversary rolls around, i will say confidently, clearly, and with NO DOUBT- the Lord has a hand in our lives. everything happens as it should and He WANTS to bless us with everything He can. this job will be one of the many clear-cut, heavenly-directed, completely undeserved at the time, blessings of my life. there is no way it could have happened so perfectly without His hand guiding me (and also answering the prayers of my god-faring boss). im so grateful that i listened to the whisperings of the spirit & for my brother kevin for giving my phone number to a boy i'd never even met or seen.

i quickly met brad, had a few bumps & lived on random couches until i found an apartment in the pierside ward, got on my feet financially & spiritually, met some of the most lovely friends of my adulthood, fell in love, married a wonderful kind man, had a baby & now STILL have this job that sustains our family.

happy late three year anniversary, JMB.

tomorrow! tomorrow!

i am super super excited about a big change for our family that is going to happen & i can't tell you officially until tomorrow. bc some people need to be told in person first. and no, we're not pregnant.
BUUUUUTTTT...
i. am. so. happy. that the answer to the prayer was YES!
strange things afoot at the circle k!

thursday pep talk

yesterday i rocked at work. (yes, i am bragging.)
i got a ton finished. i did a good job. i was happy. i was productive. i was proactive.
so naturally today i feel like i deserve to eat cake & blog.

i resisted the cake.... and caved to a short blog.
and to get me back into the groove, let me just say:
i am good at what i do. clients like me. i help. i am happy. im glad i am trusted & valued. :)

dear blog,

im sorry for being mean about the lady with ugly hair. im sure someone looked at my hair in my two tiny ponytails (affectionately called my "nubbins") and thought that i had the ugliest most adolescent hair ever.

also, life has been CRANKY the last couple weeks. we've tried to stay super busy, but life is getting to be a little overwhleming. luckily its FALL. seriously. the change in season might just save our lives & attitudes. the other night our neighbors woke us up TWICE yelling at their kids/eachother/someone, faye woke up TWICE crying cause she's teething, AND there was an EARTHQUAKE. i mean- even planet EARTH didin't want us to sleep! sheesh.

anyway, blog, i just wanted to say im sorry for being so grouchy. remember when i used to post short funny anecdotes & memories? i should do that again. it made me remember how many funny/happy/cute things are happening in the world around me.

affectionately,
linds

p.s. this morning i heard j-lo's "im real" on the radio and i knew ALL THE WORDS. i was actually impressed and surprised at myself. i didn't even know i knew any of that song. apparently that obsession with lyrics from high school made them permanent. :)

ramblings

1. i thought about 9/11 a lot before and on 9/11. im glad im old enough to remember it, understand the consequences and realize how lucky i am to live where i live & enjoy the freedoms i do. God Bless America & my wonderful ancestors who got on disease-ridden boats and moved their homes, lives & hopes to this country!

2. i am SO HAPPY its getting to be fall for a TON of reasons- one being our Disneyland passes work again. we went yesterday- we sat on the curb at the parade & pluto came right up to faye & talked to her, as well as about 3 other dancers- i guess she is pretty cute! she was sooo happy watching everything. :)

3. also i saw the WORST utah hair in the world yesterday. everything about this woman screaaaamed utah style & i wanted to go up to her, touch her on the shoulder & say "excuse me, but your ridiculous outfit attempt to cover your garments & your HUGE TERRIBLE hair-school hair cut is ruining my disneyland experience- can you go back to utah now?" i didn't say it, bc that is a terrible thing to tell a person, but sadly, it was true.

4. we are counting down 2 years of marriage. we sat through a 90 min seminar on our honeymoon & are taking a free cruise to ensenada- woot! there is nothing to get you through a recession like a free vacation to look forward to!

5. faye has started to be clingy. and cry when we leave the room. or vacuum, or put her to bed. it's not fun sometimes, but secretly, i kinda love it. she has NEVER been snuggly- as soon as she got enough body control to push out of our arms- she did. now she cries & wants me to hold her. that's nice. she does love me!

6. week 8 of p90x. "i hate it, but i love it!" i feel great- not much skinnier, but stronger & all the endorphins, and having chick-time with my neighbor everyday help alot :)

shouldn't i be tired?

i mean, in the past 6 days:
i moved an entire office in boxes for 4 days. i played with crazy cute children. i stayed up late talking. i did p90x (okay i finally had to skip a couple days, but i made up for it.) i went to the MIL's and got a migraine from the dog. i stood and baked, filled & frosted 300 cupcakes. i cut & washed piles of fruit. i worked 5 hours every day. i clean up a wedding reception. i washed dishes. i carried around a 16.5 pound baby. i stood for an hour helping teenage girls do baptisms. i even got like 5 hours of sleep every night for the past week. head, back, feet- all in uproar. i feel like i piled on the ingredients for a much needed slumber.
so i beg the question... WHY CAN'T I SLEEP??

something about poop

my daughter likes to poop a couple times a week. makes it nice bc i only have to clean up poop a few times a week, right? wrong. when she goes it is usually in a cute outfit, in somewhere uncomfortable, hard to clean up & a terrible embarrassing mess.
.
here are a few places that have been graced (?) by her explosive bowels:
1. at a bridal shower in someone else's house when i forgot a change of clothes(that mistake was never made again!) poor huli has holding her & got a wet handfull!
2. at the grungy mechanic's getting an oil change/smog & i had to change her on a greasy, gross chair in a waiting room. surrounded by middle eastern men. with cigars and chest hair peeking out of their shirts. not a lie.
3. at the tire place getting our rims replaced in a brand new- never before worn outfit. i had to change her on a table covered in car magazines. hello bikinis. oh, also that time she pooped THREE times so i ran out of diapers(also hasn't happened since) and had to drive home diaperless, hoping she didn't pee/poop all over the whole car.
4. standing in the middle of red rock canyon taking anderson family pictures. that was perfect timing. not. that time at least i was with family!

and to TAKE THE CAKE:
5. on a delta flight home from SLC. oh faye, faye, faye... why do you do this to your mother????
i decided i couldn't hold my own pee til we landed so i take her with me into the stall. i am hovering, holding one wall and a baby in the other arm. naturally, at this moment of time we decide to hit turbulence and i hear the seatbelt sign go "ding!" i wish i was making this up. all my energy is now focused on not hitting my baby against the stall wall. we make it out alive & mostly dry *wink* and i get back to my seat. literally 2 seconds after i sit the captain says we are starting our decent & should be at the gate in half an hour.(haha half an hour- anyone else watch 30 rock?!) anyway... then i hear it- *pwwwwwoopppppojkgykd dcghjresfvhcaet!" the sound that means 3 days worth of poo has been released. no seriously. she couldn't have waited until we landed. or were off the plane. in the airport. at HOME in an hour???
i rush to get her super cute im-in-public-look-at-how-cute-i-am pjs off to salvage what i can. then i hear round two "ppppppwieahieudfbjslfjvdshizoITOE!!"
i am thinking "OMYGOSHWHATAREYOUDOINGPLEASESTOPPOOPINGWHYHEREWHYNOW!!"
eek.
i look at the wonderful mother/nurse sitting next to me & say- I NEED YOUR HELP. she holds baby out while i lay down a big blanket & then a burp cloth on top over my whole lap. we put her down. we get out a arm & hammer baggie from the diaper bag (thanks melissa!) and i peel off the diaper. poop is everywhere. ev.ry.where. there was poop on the seat, my clothes, up my arm & im sure some other places i can't remember. all i know is i wiped anything and everything in sight. in the end i just threw out the burp rag with the diaper and 25 wipes(okay, slight exaggeration). bless that sweet woman & her daughter next to me- they were helpful & kind & not grossed out at all. i don't know what i would've done with out their help!
by the time it was all over we had about 2 minutes before landing.

i wish that these stories weren't true. and that i was a big fake phony who makes up poop stories & plasters them on the internet. but they aren't. you can't make this stuff up. oh faye, we love you, why can't you just go at home in your ugly onesies? plus, who wants to read blogs about poop???

Mr & Mrs Werner!!

a few completely AWESOME things happened last weekend.

faye & i flew to salt lake city on saturday morning, attended a wedding & reception, stayed the night in a hotel with grandma wendy & flew out sunday morning back home. im getting really awesome at really short trips! whew!

#1. this lady who i LOVE got married to the perfect man. how did i know he really WAS perfect?? when they got engaged he basically said "i love you, will you marry me, and to sweeten the deal i bought you this kayak!" match made in heaven! they got married in the draper, ut lds temple. i went to find a restroom and walked passed the bride's room. i thought happily to myself "jamie is probably in there right now!" and then as i passed who should come out?? JAMES!!! we cried & hugged & squeezed and held on tight. it was the best moment of my whole day! :) perfect timing! the whole day all i could think was how kind my Father in Heaven was to bless me with a friend as seriously RAD as jamie.(ugh. i am seriously the least photogenic person ever. i wish i had another picture of us together.)

(waiting for aunt jamie to come out!)

#2. then to make it even BETTER, my bff tyler from high school came up to see us & even crashed the reception! classic. i was sad brad couldn't come with me, but i'll take a friend like tyler as a substitute date anytime! it was a momentous meeting- after all, tyler lafayette vermillion thinks my daughter is his namesake ;)

#3. on the way out, grandpa's flight came in early so we even got to see grandpa keith for a half hour in the airport! hooray!! we don't see him very often so it was so exciting for him to see how much faye has grown in 2 months! love you pops!

sincere wish

today i wish, in all seriousness, that i lived in a british country manor wearing constrictive gowns and having nothing to do but read books, walk, ride horses, and embroider.

or at the very least throw this reporting software out a window. :)

am i hispanic??

this morning as i sang along to all the lyrics of 'fotografia" by juanes & nelly furtado, i realized i might be becoming a latina.

here's how i figure:
i loved & learned tons of spanish in high school. i begged my friend in college to mostly talk to me in spanish to help me learn & remember. on my list of "things important in the man i will marry" right after "faith in Jesus Christ" was "speaks spanish". if i had gone on a mission i am convinced i would have learned spanish. someday brad & i will go & i hope its somewhere warm, beautiful & latino!
i love spanish music. not so much the "bum-bum-bum-bumbum-bum-bum-bum" but pop spanish music? yes. i love it. shamelessly. (you all know my ridiculous love of shakira, i mean it's really sad but true.) i listen to Mana Pandora radio at work roughly 3x a week. i want faye to learn some basic words so we always play "touch your nadiz with your pie" (nose/foot) and give me a "beso" (kiss)
also lately with the lack of cable and the lack of good shows on tv now that its summer, maybe i sometimes find myself laughing at goerge lopez. (okay, maybe that one is a little shameful!)

i'd say im on my way to latina-ville for sure. i don't think it's unhealthy... yet. when i start drawing on my eyebrows please have an intervention ;)

Kelli's Graduation

HOORAY!!! My best friend graduated college!!!
Back in May we took a weekend trip to Vegas to go to my bff Kelli's graduation. It was awesome- what an accomplishment.We got to sit and cheer her on getting that diploma- I was SO PROUD!

We love you Aunt Kelli!!

Kelli & her parents, Leesa & Dave, & her son, Dylan.

"What? I'm eating my hands."

DOUBLE FISTED. Hilarious. Sucking on one hand at a time is not enough apparently. She sat through the whole thing with out a peep. She loves to sit and watch all the action.

i'm in doctrinating her young

things my baby is learning very young:
1. how to eat gluten free brownies from the pan with a fork
2. how to watch old cheesy lovely G-rated English TV shows (as many episodes we can fit in until daddy comes home and makes us change it) like this:

if you don't have something nice to say....

well i DO have something to say because it IS nice! :)

.
do you ever think "gosh i am due for a good day any day now??" like so many crappy days have come on top of each other and so much stress compounded in your left shoulder blade that SOMETHING has got to give??
well today it did.
i have felt overwhelmed and tired. stressed and alone. work, church, family all sometimes pile on top of each other and it's hard to climb out of the mess without something getting thrown to the ground ungraciously.
its a sure sign that i am stressed when i don't want to talk about it. or that i don't. or that i hide on my couch nursing a netflix addiction instead of going to mutual. i'm not even blogging cute pictures of my angel baby. WOWZA.
.
but my friends, i am happy to announce i am going to try harder now. lots of reasons for stress have been either resolved or begun the process of resolution.
this is good. i can do this.
i am grateful to my loving Father in Heaven for much needed help. and answers to prayers we started 2.5 years ago. and a sweet little baby who smiles HUGE when she wakes up from naps. and new cars that are very quiet on the freeway. it's really the little things that help. it's amazing how much pondering you can get done when you aren't distracted by the irritation of too much road noise!
i have wonderful friends. they may be few but they are true and beautiful and wonderful confidants and cheerleaders.
ra ra shish boom ba! goooooo lindsey!
i'm glad it's friday, and most of my favorite little people are coming to see me tomorrow. i miss their little faces and tiny food covered fingers. i wish i could hug them as tight as i love them, but i also don't want to hurt them, so in true female fashion we usually raise our voices to a very high & loud pitch.
.
in short, i was due for a good day and today I GOT IT.
everything went as it should. happiness is not overrated.
and sometimes being mostly bald with a crazy cowlick is exactly perfect.

some things you just shouldn't dispute..

like how sweet this little munchkin is!

sorry about the cell phone pictures... i just only seem to remember to document her little life when my camera isn't around!

she is getting so sweet nowadays. she smiles and TALKS and snuggles and loves to sit in her little bumbo chair. she is AWESOME.

i love how happy she can be. and predictable. bless the child that loves a schedule. she cries when she is hungry and starts to fuss when she is tired. she doesn't like it when her bows slide down her head and cover her eyes. she doesn't like the car seat when she is tired bc i think it's hard to fall asleep in bc she's uncomfy. we've had a few hard days here and there, but mostly things are GREAT in our little home! she's so funny and squeals when she smiles- who can resist that!?

Where's the baby?

The Easter Bunny

Look what the Easter Bunny left in our basket!! A little fat baby girl!

Don't you just love her jammies?? They look just like an egg- so fitting :)

Get me outta this stinkin' basket! haha

it was 80 degrees today :)

Did anyone else get CRAZY HORRIBLE postpartum migraines? Maybe bc I'm susceptible to headaches to begin with, but at about 4 weeks I started getting a headache like.. everyday. I know you are thinking, "DUH you don't sleep for 8 hours straight ever anymore" but honestly I feel like I get A LOT of sleep. Faye sleeps 5-7 hours a night.

Case and point: She slept from 11:30- 4:30 last night, got up and ate, and then slept from 4:50 to 9:50. That's like 8 hours of sleep for me with only one small interruption! I am super lucky.
.
I just wonder maybe it is just me, or how I'm sleeping or eating.
Either way, I'm over it.

In other news Faye, Amy and I went to the beach today while Brad ran Ragnar. :)

some love from the coworkers

hilarious & cute babies

one of the many perks of having 2 friends with babies all due in the same week is that they are all practically the same age. it's fun to see them all grow and their mommies shrink! ha
the best part about these pictures is lyla didn't cry at all until these pictures, jude was totally calm before these pictures & faye was crying before the pictures.

our babies are hilarious, cute & awesome.
they are all so darling i want to pinch their cheeks!

lyla a., jude h. & faye b.

i call her my pookie

piggies

this little piggy went to target
this little piggy stayed home
this little piggy likes the car seat
this little piggy likes daddy's arms
this little piggy cried wee wee wee all night long!

today i took my baby to work

i am so fortunate. in so so so many ways.

i have the best husband in the world. he is kind, happy, patient, takes one of the middle of the night feedings, snuggles our baby like it's going out of style, and is basically the primary reason i laugh and smile each day. he can get me to laugh and laugh and laugh. i love him.

i have a fantastic office and work situation. its been a HUGE blessing in so so many ways. i love who i work with and have been truly blessed with employment. i count finding my job as one of the many moments God has directed my life and showed his love for me when i least deserved it.

today faye and i took a trip to visit my work(since i'm still on leave). the two grandmas went crazy bc they only have grandSONS and this baby came wrapped up in PINK, the other young girl has nervous bc she'd only ever held one other baby, and my 6'9'' boss was a very sweet gentle giant. it was SO NICE to go and see and hug and tell them i miss them and love them. it was nice and comfy and familiar and the drive there was weirdly natural. my work has always made me feel confident and empowered and I CAN DO IT. i'm good at it. it's awesome.

but my favorite moment today was picking up my waking baby from her cradle, snuggling her up, feeding her and getting her back to sleep. no fuss. no drama. with confidence and getting-better(not perfected) technique. it's been almost 3 weeks and today i felt the strong contrast of the I CAN DO IT of my wonderful employment, and the I CAN DO IT of my wonderful job: being faye's mom & brad's wife. and that job is yet another more powerful reminder that God loves me and has faith in my abilities and capabilities and blesses and directs my life. :)

first trip to target!

due to a diaper purchase mishap, i discovered this afternoon we had over 100 size 1 diapers and exactly ONE size newborn in our house.
now, miss poopy pants really has a great GI tract. its like clockwork. it functions MORE than adequately. this means this one solitary diaper will not last till daddy comes home to go to the store. i could use a size 1, but then i risk more disaster.
this means one thing: baby's first outing to target. a momentous occasion. i wish i had had the presence of mind to take a picture, bc she will surely become addicted like her mother, and her first trip should have been documented. so sad. oh well, too bad.
i had to wake her up from a nap, change diaper (we now have zero diapers of correct size in the house), put on clothes, put her in car seat, get myself dressed and out the door. we managed to get there, get into the store, purchase what we needed (ON SALE to boot!), find out the "$5" giftcard i found in my wallet really had 20 DOLLARS on it (sweet!) and get home without any drama.
in fact, she didn't even cry. she just slept. like an angel. :) hooray for our first trip out of the house! a success!

i've been a mom for a week

it's surreal. it's awesome. it's crazy. i love my little snuggly faye. she is SO GOOD and we love her so much! GO HERE to see some pictures :)

baby faye....

is NOT HERE YET. gotcha! ;)
so instead i've been doing a few things:

#1. major nesting going on around here.

there are to do lists everywhere. if brad looks, or thinks, or attempts to talk to his wife- its like the "we need to still dos..." come pouring out of my mouth without even trying.

if she doesn't come soon we are in a fair way to have a completely different house in a few days. i've already bought a new shower curtain, towels and decor for our bathroom. its very nice and much cuter... but necessary...? probably not. again, its like my car drives itself to tjmaxx home goods. i don't even have to think about it- its like a MAGNENT that store...

we bought new couches this morning. THIS MORNING. we've been talking about it for a LONG TIME and been saving our pennies and looking and looking and finally we took the plunge! they arrive tomorrow. I CAN'T WAIT!! I am sitting on our crappy cheap uncomfortable couch, for what may be the LAST TIME- halleluJAH!! i can't wait to snuggle my baby on a snuggly couch.

this couch situation is a testimony for craigslist. we found some couches we thought we'd want last night, came home and put our couch on craigslist. SERIOUSLY ten minutes later we'd had 2 calls and a text. an hour later some lady who lives down the street came & brought us money. she's picking it up in like half an hour. AMAZING!! now if we could convince someone they want this AWESOME Restoration Hardware Oversized chair (which saved me my whole pregnancy bc its so deliciously comfy) we'd be set!! (or else our living room will be VERY crowded)
want it?? http://orangecounty.craigslist.org/fuo/2222530304.html

#2. my 3rd nephew was born this week. Aksel Anderson. i am in love with him already. i love all my nieces and nephews. seriously i can't talk, brag, or hear enough about them. i think my family is, quite frankly, the best producer of funny cute children ever. their faces are plastered all over our fridge.
he is teeny tiny at 4 lbs 9 oz and came about 3 weeks early. this means he is a trooper AND he beat his cousin coming to earth. MAJOR BUMMER. well, not for him, but for me. i am now more impatient than EVER to hold my little person. course... when she gets here i'll have her forever, so i think i'll be able to handle a few more days. wish me luck!!

one of these things is not like the other....

bahahahahha. one fat foot. visibly. its awesome. :) one more week!!

Things I will NOT miss about being Pregnant:

1. The whole hips aching/popping thing going on. I know they are loosening up and getting ready to have a baby and all.. but seriously- can you make it stop? I've lost my balance once or twice from sitting or laying down and getting up and trying to walk bc they are soooo wobbly and painful.

2. Heartburn. I had NO IDEA what heartburn was. Never had it. In fact, after describing how I felt, it was Brad who had to tell me what it was since I'd never felt that way EVER before. Now me n' heartburn are best frenemies.

3. Having my spleen, kidneys, stomach, intestines, cervix & whatever else is in there get kicked around. I love that she's active, but it does get a little tiring to feel like a punching bag!

4. Feeling like the size of a house. And most importantly not being able to do anything about it. I can't wait to wear my one favorite pair of jeans again. :) My favorite(or most torturous) pregnancy dreams have been the ones about running. I'm always wearing my fav pink sports bra, black tank & black & green nike shorts. Sometimes I'm outside and sometimes i'm at the gym. I'm always running good and feeling on top of the world... THEN I wake up and feel sad bc I miss running. Give me a few months!!

Things I will miss about being Pregnant:

1. Nice people: Once you cross the "Is she fat or pregnant?" threshold and the clearness of your pregnancy is 100%, people are SO NICE to you. They ask you how far along you are, what you're having, names, if it's your first, they tell you how exciting and how wonderful children are. I LOVE IT. I love having doors opened and nice people picking up things off the floor of the grocery store that I drop. It's like the whole world is on your bandwagon cheering you on to the bitter end! Someday when I am done being pregnant and am just FAT, it will be sad to go to the grocery store and get no sympathy from anyone.

2. Service: I do not get myself snacks, pillows, or drinks once Brad is home. He brings them all to me. He asks if I need anything. At 3 Am he refills glasses, adjusts pillows, and brings saltines. He finds my phone, which seems to be always lost. He's nice like that. One day I will not be fat and slow, and actually physically able to pop off the couch with ease, and it will be sad.. think of all the blessings Brad is getting from serving me so faithfully! ;)

3. Brad and Lindsey as a two person team: We are going to have to change the whole game plan. No more one-on-one: we will have to play Horse or Pig. Bocce ball is a lot harder with 3 people. Chess & checkers, too. LUCKILY tho our family house favorites are Uno and Yahtzee, both of which accomodate the masses and thereby secure future Family Home Evenings where everyone can participate. I am going to miss the times we end up at Costco or Disneyland or the beach and don't have to pack any diapers or worry about feedings and nap times. It's a lot easier to pack for 2 than 3, I can imagine...

4. Not being alone: I can be alone. I can even enjoy it... but NOT being alone is infinitely more enjoyable. I like that I have had a very small little buddy for the past 8+ months and she goes everywhere with me, and without complaint. She likes Target and the doctor's office and TJMaxx and the grocery store. She even likes sitting by the pool in the sunshine. I talk to her while I drive and sing to her- she likes musicals, Matt&Kim, and country music alot. Granted, I realize now I will NEVER be alone once she comes... but soon she will have an opinion on what we do & what we listen to. :)

5. Anticipation: I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT IS COMING OR WHAT TO DO. WHAT WILL SHE LOOK AND BE LIKE??? This is the only time I will REALLY be looking into the face of the unknown. It's scary and grand and wonderful all at the same time!

6. Comraderie: I love that I have friends and family all prego with me at the same time. I love that we can commiserate. And share ideas of what to eat. I love that we all had baby showers and got to celebrate each other's wee ones. I love watching other people's bellies grow huge and the same rate mine is. :)

Do you see what I see?

Two oranges.
Two delicious, round, orange little fruits that grew on our tree!!
We had 7, but these 2 were the winners who lasted til the bitter end. We are going to pick them and see if they are any good yet- it's still a young lil tree.
I love having plants- this year we had GREAT blooms and leaves and general green-ness in abundance! :)

Hello, my name is Lindsey

and I am:

• 35 weeks pregnant. I'm really hoping I only remain pregnant for another 4. That would be ideal. Although, I love being pregnant nowadays. I spent the better part of the first... um.. 7 months of pregnancy feeling like utter and complete crap, so NOW that the swelling- oh the swelling!- travel and hormones have evened out, I'm feeling pretty awesome. I can do this for 4 more weeks... but preferably not much longer than that!


• a part-time employee. That came up real fast. I have worked full time almost continuously since May of 2007. A few weeks here and there I had off between jobs, but pretty much working has been a major part of my life. Granted, I will still be working 6-hour days for a couple weeks, but just the fact that I am starting into the "Part-Time Working Mama" phase of life is kinda CRAZY. I have BIG plans to get a pedicure and do laundry in that time I've gained this week :)


• nervous/tired/excited/happy/worried/thrilled/bummed/sad/ready/prepared/utterly unprepared ALL AT THE SAME TIME. Life is about to change for good. For ever. Completely and totally. My social life is already at an all time low, my weight at an all time high, my sleep at low, coupon-cutting skills high, my husband's happiness at all time record breaking highs, house mess: high, cute small pink shoes/outfits/blanket count: high, fear of the unknown:high, potential for greater eternal happiness: high.:)

blackbird?

i feel like its somehow sacrilegious.... but seriously EVERY OTHER VERSION of "blackbird" is better than the Beatles original.
how does that work?